I finally got my book to the printer
and they are running off a draft for me
to check. I haven't picked it up yet,
but the thought of it actually being out
in the world is making me very, very nervous.
I don't really know why as it isn't
that extreme...except that it's mine.
Last night I dreamed I went to school in
a t-shirt. Only a t-shirt! People
kept trying to tell me that was all
I had on...motioning, falling back,
looking so shocked, yelling, hooting
etc. (I think this is another alheimers worry)
Anyway, finally, a male teacher grabbed me and
shoved me in a classroom and said, "What
the hell are you doing?" It was then
I realized my state of dress..and was horribly,
horribly embarrassed and I woke up with
such relief that I'd had a most embarrassing
dream. It wasn't real. I didn't actually do that...
and then, I thought, Is it this book?
Am I saying too much? What will be the reactions?
Can I live with what people think?
There is no sex in my book.
But my sister is writing hers.
I do reveil some harsh moments in mine
I do feel exposed. Is that it???
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Isn't it a relief to wake up and realize what you were doing in a bad dream didn't really happen. I have to laugh at your jitters. I think everyhing is going to be fine! I guess doing family books doesn't affect you as this one did! Now I am curious. I can't wait to read it.
ReplyDeleteIt's the old school teacher dreams. Don't let it slow you down. Camille and I talked today about giving up the history books and just doing the creative so that the accuracy isn't something that we have to works so hard on.
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